Trying to find myself
So my new girlfriend has been encouraging me to cum out and be myself with my bisexual anal playing. But when I sent her a story I wrote describing her fucking me with a strapon, she balked at the idea which crushed me...again.
She also gets put out when I play because she can't understand why I would rather play with my self and not just with her. I've been depressed and frustrated for months...again. Secretly still playing in the shower, keeping it to myself.
The other night though, the new girlfriend decided that she wanted to see what all goes on when I fuck myself in the ass in the shower. In the middle of my latest play sessions, she knocks on the bathroom door and asks if she can cum in. Cautiously and surprised I answer "yes" and she cums into the bathroom just in time to see me in the shower, with one foot on the edge of the tub and bent over taking my dildo in my ass. She stands at the shower door and tells me that she wants to watch me. I tell her that that it might be a little messy because I had just started to play but she insists I continue. So I do. Slowly I fuck myself in with my 8inch dildo in the shower in front of her. She can see the ecstasy on my face as I plunge the dildo the dildo deep up inside me.
She asks if I can come out of the shower and do it so she can better see. I say "yes, but let me dry off and then I'll show you". She leaves my bathroom and I get out of the shower and dry off. I go downstairs, naked, carrying a towel and my dildo. I find her in the bedroom sitting on the bed. I take her hand and I lead her to her bathroom where I lay a towel down on the floor and stand over it. She watches me with her arms folded across her chest. I take my dildo and I put up against the opening of my ass and I push it in and gasp. She watches me with intent. I proceed to play by slowly inserting the dildo all the way into me as I twitch and gasp. I've never done anything like this in front of someone before. I'm scared to death that she will be disgusted at the sight of me.
She watches me and I look up at her with this big, 8 inch dildo shoved balls deep into my ass. She looks at me and asks "I want to see you make yourself orgasm like you tell me in your story". So I start slowly to move the dildo in and out of me. "Long strokes", I tell her, "feel so incredible". I've always dreamed of being able to do this demonstration in front of someone but never thought it would become real. "Then I go faster, harder and deeper" I tell her as I demonstrate. "And then my bowels start to contract and want to push the toy out of me but I don't stop!" I still pound the dildo into me,....ohhhhhh!" I moan as I describe each step in my process as I show it to her. Then it happens, I grunt, I moan and I scream and twitch as my orgasm rushes all over my body, from inside my ass and out to my dick where I start to ejaculate on the towel on the floor. Performing this in front of her, not knowing what her reaction will be. I can say that the display was so exciting, having her watch me play that I came. Not just inside my ass but ejaculated out of my dick. I have not done that in many years. The orgasm was intense.
As I started to cum, she approached me with her arms open and embraces me! Hugs me! as I cum. The dildo slides out of my ass and I spurt cum onto the front of her pajamas and it takes everything in me to not collapse onto the floor. She holds me up and holds me tight as I quiver in my ecstasy.
"Now I understand" she says. "That was wonderful!" and she kisses me. last night, I went to take a shower and she asks me if I was planning on playing. "I don't know" Was the answer I gave her. "I want you to, please do". So I did. When I was done and came to bed she asked me if I enjoyed my shower, "Yes I did" I answered. "Did you fuck yourself?" She asked me. "Yes I did." I replied. She kisses me passionately, deeply and we had great sex together last night.
So maybe....I'm with someone that knows and understands me...maybe?!
She also gets put out when I play because she can't understand why I would rather play with my self and not just with her. I've been depressed and frustrated for months...again. Secretly still playing in the shower, keeping it to myself.
The other night though, the new girlfriend decided that she wanted to see what all goes on when I fuck myself in the ass in the shower. In the middle of my latest play sessions, she knocks on the bathroom door and asks if she can cum in. Cautiously and surprised I answer "yes" and she cums into the bathroom just in time to see me in the shower, with one foot on the edge of the tub and bent over taking my dildo in my ass. She stands at the shower door and tells me that she wants to watch me. I tell her that that it might be a little messy because I had just started to play but she insists I continue. So I do. Slowly I fuck myself in with my 8inch dildo in the shower in front of her. She can see the ecstasy on my face as I plunge the dildo the dildo deep up inside me.
She asks if I can come out of the shower and do it so she can better see. I say "yes, but let me dry off and then I'll show you". She leaves my bathroom and I get out of the shower and dry off. I go downstairs, naked, carrying a towel and my dildo. I find her in the bedroom sitting on the bed. I take her hand and I lead her to her bathroom where I lay a towel down on the floor and stand over it. She watches me with her arms folded across her chest. I take my dildo and I put up against the opening of my ass and I push it in and gasp. She watches me with intent. I proceed to play by slowly inserting the dildo all the way into me as I twitch and gasp. I've never done anything like this in front of someone before. I'm scared to death that she will be disgusted at the sight of me.
She watches me and I look up at her with this big, 8 inch dildo shoved balls deep into my ass. She looks at me and asks "I want to see you make yourself orgasm like you tell me in your story". So I start slowly to move the dildo in and out of me. "Long strokes", I tell her, "feel so incredible". I've always dreamed of being able to do this demonstration in front of someone but never thought it would become real. "Then I go faster, harder and deeper" I tell her as I demonstrate. "And then my bowels start to contract and want to push the toy out of me but I don't stop!" I still pound the dildo into me,....ohhhhhh!" I moan as I describe each step in my process as I show it to her. Then it happens, I grunt, I moan and I scream and twitch as my orgasm rushes all over my body, from inside my ass and out to my dick where I start to ejaculate on the towel on the floor. Performing this in front of her, not knowing what her reaction will be. I can say that the display was so exciting, having her watch me play that I came. Not just inside my ass but ejaculated out of my dick. I have not done that in many years. The orgasm was intense.
As I started to cum, she approached me with her arms open and embraces me! Hugs me! as I cum. The dildo slides out of my ass and I spurt cum onto the front of her pajamas and it takes everything in me to not collapse onto the floor. She holds me up and holds me tight as I quiver in my ecstasy.
"Now I understand" she says. "That was wonderful!" and she kisses me. last night, I went to take a shower and she asks me if I was planning on playing. "I don't know" Was the answer I gave her. "I want you to, please do". So I did. When I was done and came to bed she asked me if I enjoyed my shower, "Yes I did" I answered. "Did you fuck yourself?" She asked me. "Yes I did." I replied. She kisses me passionately, deeply and we had great sex together last night.
So maybe....I'm with someone that knows and understands me...maybe?!
4 years ago