The whole Sissy thing - Chapter 1
We have all heard of the Sissy thing and even had a look in mild curiosity, but what is a Sissy and what is it that can attract real (even straight) men to a Sissy? More importantly, why would a guy become a Sissy? What follows in chapter one is a loose (and enhanced I would say) extract from the video, "A Sissy’s Purpose". It is on here posted by @denialM. I post it taking no credit for this excellent & informative piece, but to expand on it in (a) subsequent chapter(s) with my own story (which I will embellish a bit to avoid boring bits).
***
What is a Sissy? According to Wikipedia, a Sissy is a genetic male who cross-dresses, adopts hyper-feminine behaviour and then engages in stereotypical feminine activities, e.g. house-keeping, wearing make-up and often also within BDSM context. Particularly within the BDSM community, a Sissy will typically assume the submissive role to a dominant female or more likely, a male partner/s.
In many respects, I agree with this definition, but there are nuances to this as the term encompasses much. To be a Sissy, first you must be a genetic male striving to adopt a feminine image - they must WANT to look like a women and to a certain degree, WANT to act like a women.
Secondly, a Sissy must have a Sissy clit. Whether it is still a fully functioning penis or after castration - chemical or surgical - a vestigial and utterly limp cock. A true Sissy must be constantly reminded that it is NOT a man or a women, but something completely different and in many ways, PATHETIC. (Later I will discuss the need and impact of chastity on a Sissy slave.) This requirement pretty much disqualify post-op Transexual individuals from being classified a Sissy.
And third, a Sissy must be a 100% bottom submissive. Shemales who fuck are not Sissies, nor are they male-to-female Transvestites who top or just penetrate. And their partners are not Sissies…. In adopting feminine characteristics, Sissies adopt the most traditional approach of the passive feminine role during sex. The man is in charge, you are there for his pleasure and in that feminine role, a Sissy may ONLY derive pleasure from its cunt from him penetrating it. A Sissy should !NEVER! have a chance, or even desire, to use its Sissy clit to penetrate anything.
The key for a Master to really dominate, control, and OWN a Sissy, is to control its Sissy clit. All of us, and the overwhelming majority of Sissies, will probably understand and agree that post orgasm is when a Sissy sinks deepest into male-thinking delusion. They sometimes feel “ashamed” and then promise itself to try to suppress their natural submissive sissiness.
A mistake that a lot of Doms make… Allowing their Sissy to come after every sexual interaction. Doing this only allows a Sissy to think it is actually a man. The clear answer to avoid it is chastity. By controlling a Sissy’s clit, you control how many orgasms - ! IF any ! - it is allowed to have... In addition to it preventing any male delusions, chastity also keep Sissies in a constant state of arousal. And as many - or all of us - already know, when it is lustful, wanton and sex-crazed, a Sissy is at her most obedient and in its most submissive state.
Chastity is also inherently a very humiliating state to be in, especially for a Sissy and, as I will discuss later, humiliation is actually deeply arousing for most Sissies as most use this get off as an alternative for their inability to satisfy a women with penetrative sex. Most Sissies are virgins and they have masturbated beyond the point of return;- that is to say that they have trained their clitties to be stimulated very easily and they come way too fast, so not only are they now useless in size, but useless in stamina.
The chances of satisfying a women is zero. That is why a Sissy must find a Master (ideally a straight Mater, with a Bi Master a close second, and Gay or Lesbian Masters or Mistresses, equally third) to lock her clitty up to prevent it coming and sinking into a male delusion. If a Sissy is in proper chastity, AND has a regular regiment of punishments and humiliations, it adds to the sexual frustration and pain that a Sissy experiences, further humiliating and shaming it. This is what is called the Sissy downward-spiral of humiliation, frustration and submission…
The more the humiliation, the more the Sissy will want to serve and please her Master. The more the desire to serve and please, the more her Master will use it, the more it will get sexually frustrated and the more frustrated it becomes, the more abuse, degradation and humiliation it will endure just for the possibility of release, which then makes it even more obedient & submissive. This downward-spiral ‘condition’ is a great tool for any Master to use to truly BREAK and OWN a Sissy.
Now obviously, the terms and duration of chastity are completely up to the Sissy Owner, but the perfect Sissy should be in 24/7 chastity for the rest of her life as a Sissy slave and once locked up, she should never be allowed to have a real orgasm again, or even lay a finger on her bare clit. This means that the Sissy should be milked (or be allowed to milk itself), maybe twice a month - more or less (less!) depending on the Sissy and the amount of correction it needs. And when unlocked for inspection or cleaning, it should be properly restrained. To torture the Sissy even more, the Master can tease or even edge the Sissy periodically and lock it again with NO relief. Within a month or so, this condition of strict chastity and denial should transform a man’s Sissy into a very submissive, lustful, fuck-doll.
The chastity cage allows orgasm control (a more prolonged period of edging), and is used to keep Sissies sexually aroused for extended periods of time without reaching orgasm. The goal is to provide a more intense experience in the end with anal penetration and the amazing feeling of a prostate orgasm, also known as a Sissy-gasm.
Serious orgasm control is much more that just physical manipulation... There is an emotional and also psychological aspect to this. The most important factor of orgasm control is the psychological impact of being fully controlled by a Dominant. The Key-holder of the chastity device, ideally a Dom man, will often tease the Sissy to heighten the sexual tension; this teasing can often include things such as having a Sissy perform oral sex, penetrating the Sissy anally, milking the Sissy’s prostate - the Sissy G-spot -, getting it to watch her Dom partner masturbating or engaging in other sexual activities, anything really to arouse the Sissy even further.
There should be ebbs and flows of tension during each meeting and the totality of the relationship. When a Dominant senses that the Sissy is getting close to an orgasm, they should do things to lessen the arousal of the Sissy. It could simply be that they halt things for a minute or two, or apply an ice pack to a Sissy's tiny balls… When the Sissy calmed down enough, the Dominant should again increase the Sissy’s arousal. Equally, the Dom needs to moderate highs and lows for the duration of the relationship. For a Dom to be really good at this, they need to really know the Sissy. And when they do…. the Sissy rides a roller coaster of eroticism.
Often during the periods of denial, the Sissy becomes quite - even overly - eager to please the Dom to the extent that this becomes their primary focus and desire at the exclusion of absolutely everything else. In this very VULNERABLE state, they can almost become helpless and are very easily MANIPULATED; in this state, Sissies mention a feeling of UTTER DEVOTION, closeness and servitude to their Dom to the extent that it will do ANYTHING for their Dominant.
This is the state you WANT your Sissy to be in should your goal be to take advantage of it - or even if you just want to push boundaries and get it to do something that was previously a red line. And far from EVER holding it against you in future, these Sissies consider such experiences as a ‘positive’ in their relationships with their Dom. Getting a Sissy to this state, and making use of it, is often the TRUE GOAL of orgasm control.
As for the genuine Master-Sissy relationship, the Sissy should never be allowed to climax using direct stimulation to her clitty. It is ONLY ever allowed to cum from having a dick / dildo in her cunt. Once a Sissy has had an orgasm through the stimulation of its cunt, the chastity device may then removed and the Sissy’s clit cleaned under supervision. It is immediately locked up again for another, longer time, until the Sissy reaches a state when it is horny enough or trained enough to only come that way forever. In any case, the goal is the physical manipulation of the Sissy to keep her on edge to either produce a bigger orgasm, instill an emotional response, or both. Remember, a Sissy’s purpose in life is to serve men...
Their pleasure and amusement - serving a real man no matter how difficult, or perhaps because it is so difficult - are a Sissy’s only priorities. It is upsetting when a supposed Sissy is allowed to stroke her clit when being fucked by a man. If she is allowed to do that, she is not a Sissy or being dominated in any way. A bitch that touches her clitty has free will and control. She is not a submissive and the Master is not in control either; he might have a bitch to please him, but he does not have a Sissy - which will all but kill itself - to provide pleasure and amusement to him.
***
Again, thanks to @denialM for this insight and education. A bit of reflection, before I make this my own.
I get it... In particular, I get why men would want a Sissy. Who doesn't want a hole to fuck and a toy you can use & abuse for your joy an pleasure without the need to wine and dine?!? Clearly, this type of thing will attract the more adventurous Dom potentially into BDSM or just those with a bit of a sadistic streak. As for wanting to be or to become a Sissy... Putting aside those guys with actual gender dysphoria (they're very unlikely to go down this route), and focusing on guys with a more sub mindset and or Bottom guys, it is a leap I can just about make.
It is about preening and pics and "likes" (without the actual challenges women face or the boredom of it becoming a same-same thing every day). Equally, it's about the shopping with all of the before mentioned resulting in huge endorphin rushes. And then all indications are that there is glut of Bottoms and Subs, so... standing out is not a bad idea. That said, it might narrow the field to a niche group, but they might consider that worth it given the potential reward; a true Dom, more sexually driven and focus than most others. It is this potential reward which means that risks are overseen; truth be told, they might just be so involved with preparation and the search for a Dom, that they don't consider what giving up real control might involve.
Humiliation in particular can't be given much thought and yet, it's there and has been all along I guess. Males attracted to a Sissy lifestyle clearly struggled to satisfy women, they are likely to have been physically weaker than their counterparts and something tells me they were also the last to be picked for any team. The causes of this humiliation, are strengths to a Sissy so I can see humiliation actually being a turn-on for a Sissy. Again, this mitigates potential risks, if these guys thought that far. I bet it is fair to say that a Sissy might enjoy the prep and the fantasy and the start of their journey more (and so much so that they don't think ahead) while a Dom enjoys the latter stages (control and (ab)use and manipulation more). Then... there is always the element of thinking it will be a bit of fun and then being caught up in it or getting way more than they bargained for.
Read on as the next chapter makes it real (and in the meantime, please share your thoughts in the comments about the Sissy thing.
***
What is a Sissy? According to Wikipedia, a Sissy is a genetic male who cross-dresses, adopts hyper-feminine behaviour and then engages in stereotypical feminine activities, e.g. house-keeping, wearing make-up and often also within BDSM context. Particularly within the BDSM community, a Sissy will typically assume the submissive role to a dominant female or more likely, a male partner/s.
In many respects, I agree with this definition, but there are nuances to this as the term encompasses much. To be a Sissy, first you must be a genetic male striving to adopt a feminine image - they must WANT to look like a women and to a certain degree, WANT to act like a women.
Secondly, a Sissy must have a Sissy clit. Whether it is still a fully functioning penis or after castration - chemical or surgical - a vestigial and utterly limp cock. A true Sissy must be constantly reminded that it is NOT a man or a women, but something completely different and in many ways, PATHETIC. (Later I will discuss the need and impact of chastity on a Sissy slave.) This requirement pretty much disqualify post-op Transexual individuals from being classified a Sissy.
And third, a Sissy must be a 100% bottom submissive. Shemales who fuck are not Sissies, nor are they male-to-female Transvestites who top or just penetrate. And their partners are not Sissies…. In adopting feminine characteristics, Sissies adopt the most traditional approach of the passive feminine role during sex. The man is in charge, you are there for his pleasure and in that feminine role, a Sissy may ONLY derive pleasure from its cunt from him penetrating it. A Sissy should !NEVER! have a chance, or even desire, to use its Sissy clit to penetrate anything.
The key for a Master to really dominate, control, and OWN a Sissy, is to control its Sissy clit. All of us, and the overwhelming majority of Sissies, will probably understand and agree that post orgasm is when a Sissy sinks deepest into male-thinking delusion. They sometimes feel “ashamed” and then promise itself to try to suppress their natural submissive sissiness.
A mistake that a lot of Doms make… Allowing their Sissy to come after every sexual interaction. Doing this only allows a Sissy to think it is actually a man. The clear answer to avoid it is chastity. By controlling a Sissy’s clit, you control how many orgasms - ! IF any ! - it is allowed to have... In addition to it preventing any male delusions, chastity also keep Sissies in a constant state of arousal. And as many - or all of us - already know, when it is lustful, wanton and sex-crazed, a Sissy is at her most obedient and in its most submissive state.
Chastity is also inherently a very humiliating state to be in, especially for a Sissy and, as I will discuss later, humiliation is actually deeply arousing for most Sissies as most use this get off as an alternative for their inability to satisfy a women with penetrative sex. Most Sissies are virgins and they have masturbated beyond the point of return;- that is to say that they have trained their clitties to be stimulated very easily and they come way too fast, so not only are they now useless in size, but useless in stamina.
The chances of satisfying a women is zero. That is why a Sissy must find a Master (ideally a straight Mater, with a Bi Master a close second, and Gay or Lesbian Masters or Mistresses, equally third) to lock her clitty up to prevent it coming and sinking into a male delusion. If a Sissy is in proper chastity, AND has a regular regiment of punishments and humiliations, it adds to the sexual frustration and pain that a Sissy experiences, further humiliating and shaming it. This is what is called the Sissy downward-spiral of humiliation, frustration and submission…
The more the humiliation, the more the Sissy will want to serve and please her Master. The more the desire to serve and please, the more her Master will use it, the more it will get sexually frustrated and the more frustrated it becomes, the more abuse, degradation and humiliation it will endure just for the possibility of release, which then makes it even more obedient & submissive. This downward-spiral ‘condition’ is a great tool for any Master to use to truly BREAK and OWN a Sissy.
Now obviously, the terms and duration of chastity are completely up to the Sissy Owner, but the perfect Sissy should be in 24/7 chastity for the rest of her life as a Sissy slave and once locked up, she should never be allowed to have a real orgasm again, or even lay a finger on her bare clit. This means that the Sissy should be milked (or be allowed to milk itself), maybe twice a month - more or less (less!) depending on the Sissy and the amount of correction it needs. And when unlocked for inspection or cleaning, it should be properly restrained. To torture the Sissy even more, the Master can tease or even edge the Sissy periodically and lock it again with NO relief. Within a month or so, this condition of strict chastity and denial should transform a man’s Sissy into a very submissive, lustful, fuck-doll.
The chastity cage allows orgasm control (a more prolonged period of edging), and is used to keep Sissies sexually aroused for extended periods of time without reaching orgasm. The goal is to provide a more intense experience in the end with anal penetration and the amazing feeling of a prostate orgasm, also known as a Sissy-gasm.
Serious orgasm control is much more that just physical manipulation... There is an emotional and also psychological aspect to this. The most important factor of orgasm control is the psychological impact of being fully controlled by a Dominant. The Key-holder of the chastity device, ideally a Dom man, will often tease the Sissy to heighten the sexual tension; this teasing can often include things such as having a Sissy perform oral sex, penetrating the Sissy anally, milking the Sissy’s prostate - the Sissy G-spot -, getting it to watch her Dom partner masturbating or engaging in other sexual activities, anything really to arouse the Sissy even further.
There should be ebbs and flows of tension during each meeting and the totality of the relationship. When a Dominant senses that the Sissy is getting close to an orgasm, they should do things to lessen the arousal of the Sissy. It could simply be that they halt things for a minute or two, or apply an ice pack to a Sissy's tiny balls… When the Sissy calmed down enough, the Dominant should again increase the Sissy’s arousal. Equally, the Dom needs to moderate highs and lows for the duration of the relationship. For a Dom to be really good at this, they need to really know the Sissy. And when they do…. the Sissy rides a roller coaster of eroticism.
Often during the periods of denial, the Sissy becomes quite - even overly - eager to please the Dom to the extent that this becomes their primary focus and desire at the exclusion of absolutely everything else. In this very VULNERABLE state, they can almost become helpless and are very easily MANIPULATED; in this state, Sissies mention a feeling of UTTER DEVOTION, closeness and servitude to their Dom to the extent that it will do ANYTHING for their Dominant.
This is the state you WANT your Sissy to be in should your goal be to take advantage of it - or even if you just want to push boundaries and get it to do something that was previously a red line. And far from EVER holding it against you in future, these Sissies consider such experiences as a ‘positive’ in their relationships with their Dom. Getting a Sissy to this state, and making use of it, is often the TRUE GOAL of orgasm control.
As for the genuine Master-Sissy relationship, the Sissy should never be allowed to climax using direct stimulation to her clitty. It is ONLY ever allowed to cum from having a dick / dildo in her cunt. Once a Sissy has had an orgasm through the stimulation of its cunt, the chastity device may then removed and the Sissy’s clit cleaned under supervision. It is immediately locked up again for another, longer time, until the Sissy reaches a state when it is horny enough or trained enough to only come that way forever. In any case, the goal is the physical manipulation of the Sissy to keep her on edge to either produce a bigger orgasm, instill an emotional response, or both. Remember, a Sissy’s purpose in life is to serve men...
Their pleasure and amusement - serving a real man no matter how difficult, or perhaps because it is so difficult - are a Sissy’s only priorities. It is upsetting when a supposed Sissy is allowed to stroke her clit when being fucked by a man. If she is allowed to do that, she is not a Sissy or being dominated in any way. A bitch that touches her clitty has free will and control. She is not a submissive and the Master is not in control either; he might have a bitch to please him, but he does not have a Sissy - which will all but kill itself - to provide pleasure and amusement to him.
***
Again, thanks to @denialM for this insight and education. A bit of reflection, before I make this my own.
I get it... In particular, I get why men would want a Sissy. Who doesn't want a hole to fuck and a toy you can use & abuse for your joy an pleasure without the need to wine and dine?!? Clearly, this type of thing will attract the more adventurous Dom potentially into BDSM or just those with a bit of a sadistic streak. As for wanting to be or to become a Sissy... Putting aside those guys with actual gender dysphoria (they're very unlikely to go down this route), and focusing on guys with a more sub mindset and or Bottom guys, it is a leap I can just about make.
It is about preening and pics and "likes" (without the actual challenges women face or the boredom of it becoming a same-same thing every day). Equally, it's about the shopping with all of the before mentioned resulting in huge endorphin rushes. And then all indications are that there is glut of Bottoms and Subs, so... standing out is not a bad idea. That said, it might narrow the field to a niche group, but they might consider that worth it given the potential reward; a true Dom, more sexually driven and focus than most others. It is this potential reward which means that risks are overseen; truth be told, they might just be so involved with preparation and the search for a Dom, that they don't consider what giving up real control might involve.
Humiliation in particular can't be given much thought and yet, it's there and has been all along I guess. Males attracted to a Sissy lifestyle clearly struggled to satisfy women, they are likely to have been physically weaker than their counterparts and something tells me they were also the last to be picked for any team. The causes of this humiliation, are strengths to a Sissy so I can see humiliation actually being a turn-on for a Sissy. Again, this mitigates potential risks, if these guys thought that far. I bet it is fair to say that a Sissy might enjoy the prep and the fantasy and the start of their journey more (and so much so that they don't think ahead) while a Dom enjoys the latter stages (control and (ab)use and manipulation more). Then... there is always the element of thinking it will be a bit of fun and then being caught up in it or getting way more than they bargained for.
Read on as the next chapter makes it real (and in the meantime, please share your thoughts in the comments about the Sissy thing.
1 year ago