What crossdressers are and are not
What Crossdressers Are Not
While the vast majority of crossdressers are ordinary heterosexual men with an additional feminine dimension, they are stereotyped by society based on a highly visible minority who crossdress for entirely different reasons. Drag queens are usually gay or bisexual males who don women’s clothes either to mock femininity and society’s stereotypes of gays, or to find sex partners. Female impersonators dress to entertain. Transsexuals believe they are entrapped in the body of the opposite sex, and seek sexual reassignment surgery.
Understanding the "Woman Within"
There is within each man a set of personality potentials that are part of his birthright, but that society labels as “feminine” and says he should suppress. Crossdressers have made contact with these potentials and found their expression fulfilling. Integrating these into their whole personalities, crossdressers are able to smooth off some of the macho rough edges programmed by their upbringing. The result is a happier, healthier whole person.
But Why Do They Crossdress?
Much speculation has centered on why some people crossdress. No one knows for sure. While some cite hormonal or genetic factors, others favor environmental factors. Being coddled in early c***dhood, allowed to play dress up, emulating mannerisms of a girl who is respected, and even the****utic d**g to cure c***dhood diseases are factors. It appears that for many, the clothing serves as a “lens” to facilitate focusing upon and developing personality elements society has assigned to the opposite gender.
Is Crossdressing a Sexual Phenomenon?
Human being are sexual creatures. Early on, many crossdressers find the activity sexually stimulating. However, research shows the sexual factor tends to become less prominent over time. Crossdressing is more a matter of personality than sexuality. For many the need to crossdress becomes a part of the self, just as musicians need to play music, writers need to write, or ballplayers need to play ball. A life without crossgender expression is to some as tragic as the life of a musician forced to live without music. Like musical talent, crossgender expression can be a real gift.
What Types of People Crossdress?
Crossdressers come from all walks of life, races, creeds, and economic backgrounds. The phenomenon dates back many thousands of years. In some cultures, especially some Native American tribes, they were highly respected as shamans. Most crossdressers are well-educated and come from conventional family backgrounds. The vast majority are heterosexual and most are, or have been, married. Most are happy in their masculinity, and only a small percentage opt to live as women full time. A few women are crossdressers, but they are much less numerous than their male counterparts. Perhaps this is due to the relative latitude society grants to women in matters of dress and self-expression.
Can Crossdressing Be "Cured"?
The chief adjustment problem crossdressers face is societal attitudes. While these have been changing since crossdressers appeared on the Donahue Show in 1987, acceptance is far from complete. Because of possible consequences to families, jobs and friends, many crossdressers live shrouded in secrecy. Some crossdressers deny their feminine side and dispose of their clothing, only to return to crossdressing later, frustrated by the amputation of so significant a part of their personality. Some seek therapy, but as many ther****ts are not knowledgeable about crossgender issues, cross dressers sometimes find themselves educating the ther****t rather than getting the help they seek. Nor are psychiatric d**gs of benefit. There is no “cure” for crossdressing, and most crossdressers do not want one!
The Crossdresser and His Wife
How a crossdresser’s wife accepts him depends on his own degree of insight and personal maturity, the strength of their relationship, and the way in which she learns about the crossdressing. Discovering his secret can send her on an emotional roller coaster ride of anger, fear, denial and grief. She may feel it threatens her own femininity and the future of their relationship. Open and honest communication is vital here. Once a wife or partner realizes her mate isn’t leaving her for another man or for a new life as a woman, or taking risks that could destroy their financial and family life, the two of them can seek a balanced solution that suits their own unique needs and circumstances. Healing comes when the wife or partner realizes that her mate is the same person she has always known, recognizes the risk her man has taken in revealing his innermost feelings, and appreciates the trust this represents. Many of the traits that attracted her in the first place - sensitivity, kindness, appreciation of beauty, etc. - can now be seen as belonging to that “woman within.”
While the vast majority of crossdressers are ordinary heterosexual men with an additional feminine dimension, they are stereotyped by society based on a highly visible minority who crossdress for entirely different reasons. Drag queens are usually gay or bisexual males who don women’s clothes either to mock femininity and society’s stereotypes of gays, or to find sex partners. Female impersonators dress to entertain. Transsexuals believe they are entrapped in the body of the opposite sex, and seek sexual reassignment surgery.
Understanding the "Woman Within"
There is within each man a set of personality potentials that are part of his birthright, but that society labels as “feminine” and says he should suppress. Crossdressers have made contact with these potentials and found their expression fulfilling. Integrating these into their whole personalities, crossdressers are able to smooth off some of the macho rough edges programmed by their upbringing. The result is a happier, healthier whole person.
But Why Do They Crossdress?
Much speculation has centered on why some people crossdress. No one knows for sure. While some cite hormonal or genetic factors, others favor environmental factors. Being coddled in early c***dhood, allowed to play dress up, emulating mannerisms of a girl who is respected, and even the****utic d**g to cure c***dhood diseases are factors. It appears that for many, the clothing serves as a “lens” to facilitate focusing upon and developing personality elements society has assigned to the opposite gender.
Is Crossdressing a Sexual Phenomenon?
Human being are sexual creatures. Early on, many crossdressers find the activity sexually stimulating. However, research shows the sexual factor tends to become less prominent over time. Crossdressing is more a matter of personality than sexuality. For many the need to crossdress becomes a part of the self, just as musicians need to play music, writers need to write, or ballplayers need to play ball. A life without crossgender expression is to some as tragic as the life of a musician forced to live without music. Like musical talent, crossgender expression can be a real gift.
What Types of People Crossdress?
Crossdressers come from all walks of life, races, creeds, and economic backgrounds. The phenomenon dates back many thousands of years. In some cultures, especially some Native American tribes, they were highly respected as shamans. Most crossdressers are well-educated and come from conventional family backgrounds. The vast majority are heterosexual and most are, or have been, married. Most are happy in their masculinity, and only a small percentage opt to live as women full time. A few women are crossdressers, but they are much less numerous than their male counterparts. Perhaps this is due to the relative latitude society grants to women in matters of dress and self-expression.
Can Crossdressing Be "Cured"?
The chief adjustment problem crossdressers face is societal attitudes. While these have been changing since crossdressers appeared on the Donahue Show in 1987, acceptance is far from complete. Because of possible consequences to families, jobs and friends, many crossdressers live shrouded in secrecy. Some crossdressers deny their feminine side and dispose of their clothing, only to return to crossdressing later, frustrated by the amputation of so significant a part of their personality. Some seek therapy, but as many ther****ts are not knowledgeable about crossgender issues, cross dressers sometimes find themselves educating the ther****t rather than getting the help they seek. Nor are psychiatric d**gs of benefit. There is no “cure” for crossdressing, and most crossdressers do not want one!
The Crossdresser and His Wife
How a crossdresser’s wife accepts him depends on his own degree of insight and personal maturity, the strength of their relationship, and the way in which she learns about the crossdressing. Discovering his secret can send her on an emotional roller coaster ride of anger, fear, denial and grief. She may feel it threatens her own femininity and the future of their relationship. Open and honest communication is vital here. Once a wife or partner realizes her mate isn’t leaving her for another man or for a new life as a woman, or taking risks that could destroy their financial and family life, the two of them can seek a balanced solution that suits their own unique needs and circumstances. Healing comes when the wife or partner realizes that her mate is the same person she has always known, recognizes the risk her man has taken in revealing his innermost feelings, and appreciates the trust this represents. Many of the traits that attracted her in the first place - sensitivity, kindness, appreciation of beauty, etc. - can now be seen as belonging to that “woman within.”
6 years ago
