Stay the Fuck @ Home Poems

... please add your own, thanks

Poor Man-cave Rick
stuck at home with his hard dick
wife out working her rubber stamper

All he does is wack-off to Xhamster

Published by -Snap-Crotch-Beaver-

5 years ago

Comments

-Snap-Crotch-Beaver- Publisher 4 years ago

an oldy but a goody + funny

-Snap-Crotch-Beaver- Publisher 4 years ago

- Heard your parents having sex? then masturbate to it? yes, a small two-bedroom house growing up. and yes, maybe age 10 - Caught someone masturbating? Did you watch it? Did you join in? not caught masturbating, but my buddy fucked this bar pickup in his house with me there I was drunk and half-passed out on the kitchen floor but heard them having load sex for hours No, I have never cheated, and this was the closest I have come to it. In the morning they were gone. {big grin on my face for a week] - Been caught masturbating? Did they watch you? Did they join in? Yes, college in the shower during exams, dude I was studying with took one look, ran, and never saw him again! And I am straight [back then].

Fedhill49 4 years ago

to -Snap-Crotch-Beaver- : ???!!!

Reply Original comment

-Snap-Crotch-Beaver- Publisher 4 years ago

to Fedhill49 : I think that came out when our daughter read bedtime stories to her little brother - and I worked the night shift [AND they turned out JUST FINE, thank you] ;)

Reply Original comment

Fedhill49 4 years ago

to -Snap-Crotch-Beaver- : Fun!

Reply Original comment

-Snap-Crotch-Beaver- Publisher 4 years ago

to Fedhill49 : have you used this one on small children? The cats nestle close to their kittens, The lambs have laid down with the sheep. You are cozy and warm in your bed, my dear. Please go the fuck to sleep. The windows are dark in the town, child. The whales huddle down in the deep. I'll read you one very last book if you swear You'll go the fuck to sleep. The eagles who soar through the sky are at rest And the creatures who crawl, run and creep. I know you're not thirsty. That's bullshit. Stop lying. Lie the fuck down, my darling, and sleep. The wind whispers soft through the grass, hon. The field mice, they make not a peep. It's been thirty-eight minutes already. Jesus Christ, what the fuck? Go to sleep. All the kids from day care are in dreamland. The froggie has made his last leap. Hell no, you can't go to the bathroom. You know where you can go? The fuck to sleep. The owls fly forth from the treetops. Through the air they soar and they sweep. The hot, crimson rage fills my heart, love. For real: shut the fuck up and sleep. The cubs and the lions are snoring (snore) Wrapped in a big, snuggly heap. How come you can do all this other great shit But you can't lie the fuck down and sleep? The seeds slumber beneath the earth now, And the crops that the farmers will reap. No more questions, this interview's over. I've got two words for you, kid: fucking sleep. The tiger reclines in the Siberian jungle. The sparrow has silenced her cheep. Fuck your stuffed bear, I'm not getting you shit. Close your eyes, cut the crap: sleep. Flowers doze low in the meadows And high on the mountains so steep. My life is a failure, I'm a shitty-ass parent. Stop fucking with me please, and sleep. The giant pangolins of Madagascar are snoozing As I lie here and openly weep. Sure, fine, whatever, I'll bring you some milk. Who the fuck cares? You're not gonna sleep. This room is all I can remember. The furniture crappy and cheap. You win! You escape, you run down the hall As I nod the fuck off and sleep. Bleary and dazed I awaken To find your eyes shut, so I keep My fingers crossed tight, as I tip-toe away And pray that you're fucking asleep. We're finally watching our movie. Popcorn's in the microwave: "beep!" Oh shit, goddamn it, you've got to be kidding. Go the fuck back to sleep!

Reply Original comment

Fedhill49 4 years ago

Chuckles!

Kutchang 5 years ago

to -Snap-Crotch-Beaver- : Haha.. Cheers

Reply Original comment

-Snap-Crotch-Beaver- Publisher 5 years ago

to Kutchang : That works! - Thanks

Reply Original comment

Kutchang 5 years ago

Haha... Good one. Hickory dickory dock, the wife was sucking my cock. She looked up and said " Yum" with a mouth full of cum and dribbled all over my cock... Lol