Video Transcription
Dear diary, my friends have been trying to get me to go out more and I've been a bit resistant.
I mean, if you had an app on your phone that delivered fresh bottoms to your door on command, would you go out?
So, I was at this restaurant and it's fancy, but as appetizers came out, I noticed this woman looking at me.
You know the look. She gazed at me like I would quench her thirst.
She was cute and all of a sudden I needed to powder my nose.