WIFE WARNINGS AND GUIDENCE
Grunt and withdrawn lips=sign of...” I don’t approve but saying nout!”...best ignored completely if possible. Can be beneficial to the ladies heart rate
Muttering=in this state she will tell husband of her disapproval on arrival at a place out of earshot of others, most women calm from this level eventually, but the condition may continue for some hours.
Curse=at this point she explains what has been wrong in condition 1 and 2, but normally only to the husband, though this may be in public,
Period discomfort may accelerate these conditions, at which times better to be off fishing, or some other pastime, she will get over it in a few days...usually!
Pointed loud shouting= a combination of all preceding three, subject best left to smoulder and work out a solution on her own, though return to her presence may be problematic!
Extreme shouting= at this point the re-joiner “give us a kiss and tell us your sorry!” does not calm the lady, a tactical with-drawl may be necessary, however turning to leave may be unwise and doing so by reversing may be more safe. Again time apart varies, it’s a personal thing, and returning to her presence may need a health warning
With-drawl of lady slamming doors,= is a sign of some displeasure, this may be accompanied by throwing precious objects, the subsequent damage of which will undoubtedly be attributed to you, this can lead to the with-drawl of cooking and sexual services too and can last some considerable period.
Incandescence= red of face, top of lungs bawling, not to be reckoned with and suspect again tactical with-drawl may be necessary, perhaps for some days though the woodshed, spare room or attic may not be perfect it is at least safe.
Red of face [or worse puce] accompanied by curses or screaming=tends to be the warning for this the terminal faze, snatching up sharp or heavy objects is just one of the signs the lady is overly displeased, do not allow the lady between you and an escape route as be warned this has been known to be fatal, and under no circumstances allow your tackle to be exposed at any time during this phase unless you desire singing in a boys choir.
Helpful phrases at any level include, “yes dear”...”at once dear” and “certainly my love!” however subjects should avoid admitting too much, and over-submitting, that road leads to loneliness and extensive outgoings.
Beware of variations to this formula, this opponent is both subtle, and cunning.
Muttering=in this state she will tell husband of her disapproval on arrival at a place out of earshot of others, most women calm from this level eventually, but the condition may continue for some hours.
Curse=at this point she explains what has been wrong in condition 1 and 2, but normally only to the husband, though this may be in public,
Period discomfort may accelerate these conditions, at which times better to be off fishing, or some other pastime, she will get over it in a few days...usually!
Pointed loud shouting= a combination of all preceding three, subject best left to smoulder and work out a solution on her own, though return to her presence may be problematic!
Extreme shouting= at this point the re-joiner “give us a kiss and tell us your sorry!” does not calm the lady, a tactical with-drawl may be necessary, however turning to leave may be unwise and doing so by reversing may be more safe. Again time apart varies, it’s a personal thing, and returning to her presence may need a health warning
With-drawl of lady slamming doors,= is a sign of some displeasure, this may be accompanied by throwing precious objects, the subsequent damage of which will undoubtedly be attributed to you, this can lead to the with-drawl of cooking and sexual services too and can last some considerable period.
Incandescence= red of face, top of lungs bawling, not to be reckoned with and suspect again tactical with-drawl may be necessary, perhaps for some days though the woodshed, spare room or attic may not be perfect it is at least safe.
Red of face [or worse puce] accompanied by curses or screaming=tends to be the warning for this the terminal faze, snatching up sharp or heavy objects is just one of the signs the lady is overly displeased, do not allow the lady between you and an escape route as be warned this has been known to be fatal, and under no circumstances allow your tackle to be exposed at any time during this phase unless you desire singing in a boys choir.
Helpful phrases at any level include, “yes dear”...”at once dear” and “certainly my love!” however subjects should avoid admitting too much, and over-submitting, that road leads to loneliness and extensive outgoings.
Beware of variations to this formula, this opponent is both subtle, and cunning.
3 years ago
