Ramble-y bamble-y Bits: How do you share personal

Humm. If you were trying to connect with someone, or let someone know something private or special about yourself what would you tell them or show them?

I know that giving yourself physically to someone is a big step in things like this but I don't have an interest in it, or at least not yet? Haha. But things like sharing the music I love with someone is something very personal to me. Things like specific songs that I like to listen to when I'm being dorky and what not. Or BOOKS! Yeah, I like sharing books, quotes, and stories, or forcing someone to give me story time. Story time makes me go aww yiss. Especially if it has dragons in it, or battles and sword fighting, or space stuff, space stuff is cool.

I know a lot of the people I talk to on here have a thing for sharing naughty things. Naughty fantasies aren't really my forte. I have them but I'm terrible at sharing or explaining them. So I'd rather not because I'm a huge dork and I don't want to be total boner kill like I am nine out of ten times it's been brought up in conversation. Part of me wants to play the 'I am shy and I can't explain it because I get embarrassed' card and while it's true and I admit that I'm too embarrassed to share them, inside my brain is on fire and I want to spill my guts and I wish that I could share them, my mind battles between 'ooh try the sexy talk, maybe add some naughty words' and the 'and they put the thing in the thing and they do the thing and it's nice' lol.

WHAT IF I SHARE MY SHIT AND THEN THEY BACK OFF GOING 'OH SHIT, SHE'S CRAZY' or something like that?? I swear, my fantasies aren't dirty or creepy like poop and beatings and a****l sacrifice or something like that, bahahaha. But yup. It's like the most secret things I have to be honest and really if I think about it I don't think I'd even share them with someone even if I were dating them for a bajillion years and we still hadn't done the frick frack because I'm probably a closet prude or something. I dunno.

I'm bored of typing so I'm gonna cut it off here. Choppa choppa.

Published by Created

10 years ago

Comments

Do it with a fez on ;-)

mellow_fellow 8 years ago

This may sound trite, but I recommend being honest! It's all a question of mind over matter: those who matter don't mind, and those who mind don't matter. For example, if you're like: "Oh, man! I love burgers with a ton of onions," and the other person is like: "Ew, onions, gag!" it doesn't break a friendship; you simply find a way around it. There are plenty of other things to like. If someone doesn't like -anything- you're into, then the friendship doesn't last, and you sort of go your separate ways - which is probably better, since you'd drive each other nuts. Living by this methodology, you'll eventually find yourself surrounded by people who like you for who you are - and the superficial, overly-polite types will drift away, or never attach themselves in the first place. Likewise, let's say you're talking about sex, and you're like: "I really love the idea of a lover going down on me while looking me in the eye, all heated, so that there's that person-to-person connection the whole time," and it turns out the other person is squicked by putting their mouth on a person's bathroom bits, there are a ton of other options out there. If you're simply talking to friends, it's no big deal; you don't need to share erogenous appetites to enjoy each other's companty. If you're in a relationship with someone, and have none of those things in common, then it's time for a serious talk. Better to get to know one another's preferences well ahead of time, so you know if you're compatible. Of course, sex is just one facet of the relationship. Share that music (-especially- the dorky stuff!), share those books! Write fiction, and let the other person edit it; and vice versa. What better way to get to know one another's minds than through shared creativity? Cook meals together, wander around and talk about random things. Some couples live happily together for years or lifetimes without being bedroom-compatible, simply because they are best friends the rest of the time (though an occasional carnal fuffle on birthdays or New Year's doesn't hurt -_^ ). Speaking of dorky songs, here's a quote from Professor Elemental to close: Celebrate your oddities, your worth, your sexuality; Celebrate your urges, celebrate humanity; Celebrate your fetishes! My message is clear: There's no such thing as normal; everybody's weird. Celebrate your oddities, your art, your own insanity; Celebrate your birth, celebrate humanity; Celebrate your everything - and let me be clear: There's no such thing as normal; everybody's weird. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tFL5GTKwonQ

Most of us are crazy so it's no big thing.

altrego2 10 years ago

Another reader, eh. And in my area of interest! If you want to meet/share f2f "anonymously" with other readers look for a small local sci fi convention. :D Post a list of favorite books and see who bites. This being an "adult" site that is what folks here are nominally looking for but there are those of us who would happily talks books and movies. Have fun!

ciclismo425 10 years ago

I share a lot of things on here which most people would consider "private", and I've never in real space met the people on xH whom I call friends. Some people may consider this odd; but letting people see how I look isn't something I consider private. Anyone can look at me; and I used to chill with friends at a naturist swimming hole, so it's nothing unusual for me to be around a bunch of people without clothes on. NBD, IMO. Stuff that I consider private; Not everyone gets to know what songs stir memories for me, whether good or bad ones. Few people get to read anything I've written, aside from scientific journal entries.

have You considered a progressive story or poem, where one person writes a paragraph and then someone else writes the next? At which point the first person - or anyone else for that matter - continues and so on.

kinky_mn_man 10 years ago

There are enough people on here with specific desires that you may never know who you will make a connection with. If you share and then the other person backs off ... then they aren't interested in the real you. Better to just find another one who will enjoy your sense of humor. By the way ... some of the best conversations I have had with people from this site, were not sexual. We spend most of ours waking hours wearing clothes and doing something other than sex (most of us do anyway).